A . A . A D . D . – Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:

I decided to water my garden.

As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I looked over at my car and decided my car needs washing.

As I started toward the garage , I noticed that there is mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier.

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full.

So I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first.

But then I think, since I’m going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway. I may as well pay the bills first.

I take my check book off the table, and see that there is only 1 check left.

My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find a can of coke that I had been drinking.

I’m going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the coke aside so that I don’t accidentally knock it over.

I see that the coke is getting warm, and I decide I should put it in the  refrigerator to keep it cold. 

As I head toward the kitchen with the coke, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye– they need to be watered.

I set the coke down on the counter, and I discover my reading glasses that I’ve been searching for all morning.

Then I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I’m going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly I spot the TV remote.

Someone left it on the kitchen table.

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I will be looking for the remote, but I won’t remember that it’s on the table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I’ll water the flowers.

I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.

So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.

Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day: 

—-the car isn’t washed,

—-the bills aren’t paid,

—-there is a warm can of coke sitting on the counter 

—-the flowers don’t have enough water, 

—-there is still only 1 check in my checkbook,

—-I can’t find the remote, 

—-I can’t find my glasses,

—-and I don’t remember what in the word I did with the car keys ! 

Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I’m really baffled, because I know I was busy all day long, and I’m really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem, and I’ll try to get some help for it,

but first I’ll check my e-mail.

Don’t laugh– if this isn’t you yet, your day is coming ! ! !

Growing older is mandatory.

Growing up is optional.

Laughing at yourself is therapeutic.

P.S. I just walked outside and SOMEONE LEFT THE WATER RUNNING IN THE DRIVEWAY !

I don’t remember if I wrote this or someone else did.