I’ve decided my blog is too eclectic. My pages aren’t, but they’re usually by-passed anyway. My problem I think is that I write what I’m intrested in, and I have too wide a variety of interests for one blog. I’m also 81 and that’s not too cool, (I myself get dreadfully impatient with fumbling old folks like myself). Since you know I’m an incest survivor and you may not be, that’s a turn-off, especially since I seem to insist on reblogging tough tales. Downs Syndrome is not a funny topic–that’s why I have a separate page for it that is almost never visited. That’s ok. I’m just taking care of my own needs there.
My About page touts me as having a sense of humor, but it’s hard to fake unless it turns into sarcasm, and I swore off that years ago. About competitiveness: I’ve come across a lovely Christian lady’s blog who appears to be my age, and she’s cheery and loving and all those things I’m not.
I”d hate to see my stats alongside hers. Either I discover a level way to attract followers or resign myself to an incidental. Incidental! That’s not what I wanted to grow up/old to be! Another disadvantage s that I’m not in a sexual relationship nor ever will be. There go about half the poetry topics. And I’m lowdown fat, so cooking leaves me out. The other day I sampled some philosopical blogs and discovered I’ve lost about half my vocabulary, if I ever possessed so erudite a one.
I could fill this blog with all my pages and stories of errors in judgment, embarrassing things I have done (shudder), boo boos and downright thoughtless and selfish things I’ve done, but I don’t think that would increase my readership.
Why do I want readers? First, because everyone else has more than me (that’s where the competitive strain comes in). Second, I do crave contact and exchange of ideas. There’s been a hole in my life ever since I finished psychology graduate school that’s never really been filled. It’s the back and forth I crave, I think. I’d fall asleep in class being lectured to for an hour or two, not to mention the dread of slight discomfort getting there and back.
SO I SHOULD RE-TITLE THIS blog Complain Complain Complain, another kind of blog I try and avoid myself. I’m not seeking reassurance from my relatives and blogging friends, so please don’t provide reassurance. Just let me pout a little while and I;ll reappear with all smiles. Did you ever catch mood swings like mine?
Nan, I see you’ve read laquemada’s post of today. Your and her posts arrived in my reader next to each other – I can relate. The only times I feel unloved or uncared for is when I’m down in the dumps, either depression (a biggie today) or when physically ill. The realisation that, to be able to make oneself a nice cuppa, one has to do the dishes first, was enough to put me back to bed with a glass of water. So there’s at least three of us today! A smile for you from the bottom end of Africa.
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I don’t even follow her and am not sure how to get to her post. I’m shivering in my boots. I’d like to visit her.
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You commented on her blog! 🙂 Here’s the link. Just click on it and it will take you to her blog. https://laquemada.org/2017/06/14/can-i-tolerate-my-own-neediness/
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P.S., Petru: I love the line about going back to bed with a cup of water!
we must be twins!
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Some things are just too much trouble some times! 🙂
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Nan, it’s Open Link Night at Dverse. Post one of your poems from Fallout, they’re really, really good!
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I thought you were going to bed with your glass of water.
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I did! Straight after the comment to you. 🙂
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Ah, that competitiveness, isn’t that funny how that can creep into everything, even our personal blogging? I really did think I just started my blog for myself, as some kind of alternative journal. But I went through a period of frequently checking my stats. But you know, there are lots of reasons people might find or not find your posts. Maybe you want to think about the categories and tags you attach to your posts? That helps people find your posts. (You can even go back and tag or re-tag posts you wrote in the past.)
It’s helped me to stop checking my stats, which at first was an effort and which now I don’t think about at all. I do, however, notice whether or not people comment on my posts. I value the comments so much, the connections from people who say they get it or who encourage me. And I try to visit all the kind people who comment (like you, thank you!), so of course that’s a way to build up conversations with people as well.
Please keep blogging with your own personal, 81-year-old, not-currently-sexual, knowledgeable-about-Downs’-Syndrome-and-incest, not-cheery-but-definitely-interesting voice. It is by no means incidental! Cheers, Q.
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Not sure if I should reply here or in my dashboard, or maybe this is my dashboard. Anyway, thanks for the sharing and following and I apologize for not recognizing laQ…I recognize you primarily by your gray vivitar (?) and Petru’s correct little l threw me off.[Was that an i?]
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You replied in the right place Nan! And it’s a gravatar. The little picture we use to identify us when we like or comment on people’s posts. Not sure why it’s called that. Be well Nan. Speak tomorrow!
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You can reply directly on the page under my comment or under the comment you see under the bell symbol, both ways work–and as you can see, I saw the reply.
Like you, I often recognize people by their avatars–which makes it all the more confusing if they change them, as they sometimes do! But after a while, we all start to get to “know” each other and care for each other in that interesting (and very real) virtual way of knowing and caring.
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I’ll just try and get an old poem onto d’Verse for now.
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When I first started following your blog your stats showed about 2000 visitors – it’s now well over six thousand in a short few months! As mentioned, I’ll email about how you can expand on the tags so more people visit your posts. Today or tomorrow.
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I’m now doubting my motivation for wanting more people to read my posts…But thanks for the feedback.
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We’re all just the same Nan. We all blog because we want the feedback, the affirmation that what we’ve put out there is any good. Not getting any visits does NOT mean what we have to say isn’t any good. I didn’t put the stats counter on because I’m terrified of what it would say. Some people’s stats are higher simply because they’ve been blogging for a longer period of time. Some stats are higher because they take part in sites like Dverse, Imaginary Garden with Real Toads, Poets United and any other sites that invites one to share one’s work. We all feel gratified when we have had ‘likes’ and comments. When I post something without linking up to any other blogs, the site visits are invariably much lower. Whenever I discuss incest, sexual abuse, violence against women, feminism and so on people run a mile! The tags help to draw more people to one’s blog, we all use it for that reason. I’ve seen bloggers have rows and rows of tags, some others not so much. You’re a good writer, your posts are intelligent and informed. I’ve seen a blogger, a good poet, get only few likes and no comments for a long time. She set out and shamelessly advertised her blog on various other social media sites like facebook and Linkedin, twitter and instagram and whatever else is out there. That the incest survivor community doesn’t visit your blog often enough is because your putting it out there is maybe not robust enough? Whatever you do, keep going!
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Thanks for the warm encouragement, my friend!
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🙂
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See https://heatherlsawaya.wordpress.com/2017/06/17/the-cat/
She posted this eight hours ago and there were no likes or comments yet. She didn’t put any tags. I picked a random post from 2015 https://heatherlsawaya.wordpress.com/2015/11/11/hermit-and-the-magic-blue-marble/
where she put zillions of tags and no-one commented or liked the post yet it is good work. Just shows you. so: don’t worry. Just keep going because you enjoy it.
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Just to let you know my own difficulties negotiation WordPress and how it works: I wanted to update my blogroll and couldn’t find out how to: so I just took it off my page altogether! I also want to create category pages and for the life of me can’t get the knack! = you’re not alone!
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Under Pages there’s an ad new, but maybe you don’t mean that. : D
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I’m not sure if that’s what I mean. I mean to, when I put a post to a category, the post should go to the page already created, ie poetry, or art or whatever. I’ll explore some more …
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Oh, I didn’t know anything about that. Maybe one needs to select a theme page that allows for a list of one’s list of used categories?
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I see what you mean. I will.
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