Health Nut – A Poem

Published April 4, 2017 by Nan Mykel


First let me get this off my chest:

I’m part animal and old’s the rest.

A cow’s valve is pumping my breath;

while a pig’s valve’s staving off death.


And you’ll see why

I try

To take care of my self.


I was going to the boonies

That night to catch me some goonies

in the tunnel that’s haunted,

while feeling undaunted.


But a stitch in my chest said go,

check it out now, don’t delay.

So as a good health nut I drove

to Urgent Care, just over there,


where  the doc

jumped up and down

in his trim green gown

and with a medical frown


called an  ambulance

while I sat in a trance

thinking why can’t I drive

round the corner myself?


ER let me stay  all day ,

Out of the way

While emergencies

came and went.


It was late and it was dark

When I asked on a lark

If I could now go

and surprised, they said “Sho.”


No wheelchair was needed,

I just walked  the field

of gopher holes in the dark

to UC, where I had parked.


Why why why did this happen to me?

And then I thought of pay back.

While dizzy, on my last UC visit,

I’d had the bad manners to

barf in his trash.







2 comments on “Health Nut – A Poem

    • Urgent care. I told you about it at the time. Happened about 6 months ago. My cardiologist the other day (yesterday, for my annual check-up) laughed and said theoir poor machines was the trouble.said they don’t have good heart machines at Urgent cares. Go there for splinters or coughs, etc.


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