Polyamorous

All posts tagged Polyamorous

RACISM part three – polygamy, anyone?

Published March 21, 2021 by Nan Mykel

I don’t know what to make of this,  so I’d like to hear from you.  I know the topic is not literally about racism, but it could be about prejudice.  How do prejudice and discrimination interface?  I’m referring to the topic introduced in the newyorker.com, “How polyamorous and polygamists Are Challenging Family Norms.”

Whew!  If it’s not one thing it’s another.  I know I have a teeny bit of prejudice against exclusive hedonists and criminals and prejudiced people,,  but the idea of welcoming multi-wife enclaves into our neighborhoods makes me almost blow my cool.  Why?  And would that make my feelings into prejudice, if it isn’t already?  Is my tensed  stomach at the idea a sign of prejudice?

True I can support gays and transgenders and almost drag queens  and maybe careful and strong self-disciplined drug users,  and am not too judgmental about the polyamorous, but something about polygamy feels like it’s stirring my prejudice.  —I guess that means I…what?  I don’t know what.  There is a difference between what could be changed and what cannot.  I understand that sexual gender and orientation cannot basically be changed (after the change).  Race cannot normally be changed (although I want to read that novel where two twins of color decide differently–one to pass, the other not.)

Although they (we) would protest, political partisans could theoretically change, as possibly misogynists could.   Is it still prejudice even if one can choose the category?.  If I turned away a neighbor polygamous wife who asks for a cup of flour at my door, I guess that would be prejudice.  But if I turned away a similar request from a wife and child beater, then what?  And does it make any difference what I call my attitude and behavior towards different groups of different folks?

Fear’s ghost wanders through some of these topics.  I know my deeply held longing for one on one bonding with another is threatened by the idea of polygamy,  as unconscious fear underlies my feelings toward black men.  But I don’t encounter many if any situations where prejudice is elicited.  I vote right and act right, even if my fears are not completely eradicated.

 

 

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