I know, I know…it depends on what or who you pray to.  But somewhere there’s got to be some rectifying  solution, doesn’t there?  I know, no one ever said life was fair, but really!

I’ve been wishing that I still believed, that I had something to pray to.  I came back from atheism to agnosticism, because I don’t really “know” anything.  This morning when I took last night’s remaining coffee from my cup I spied an old fulgurite on my bedside table, and realized what a symbol—no, relic– of power that innate piece of melted silica was.  (I knew that fulgurite is a piece of fossilized lightning strike).  If anything symbolized–and even was–power, it resided in that blackened fossil.  Maybe if I prayed to it my prayers would at least be noted?  Nonsense, I knew, but I was moved to look it up on Google, anyhow.

Imagine my surprise when I looked it up on Google and read FULGURITE MEANINGS:  Manifestation of one’s higher purpose, enhancement of prayer, kundalini awakening, purification, sudden awakening  Chakras: All   Element: Storm    Zodiac Signs: Virgo, Gemini    Number: 6

Fulgurite Crystal Healing Properties

Fulgurites are a powerful high vibration stone for manifesting one’s visions through the power of prayer. They are stones of purification, releasing habits which no longer serve, helping to open and clear the psychic and intuitive senses in order to connect with Divine energy. It activates the Kundalini energies, arousing creativity, sexuality and inner power. It is an initiator of spiritual transformation grounding the Light body and manifesting one’s higher purpose through channeling Divine energy into the world.

From <https://feelcrystals.com.au/product-category/crystal-meanings/fulgurite/>

Heavy, huh?  But I still can’t cotton to the idea of God being an old, old, old man (?) surveying a worldwide playing field.  Perhaps a universe wide one?    Christians are right, everyone else in the world is wrong?  How convenient for them.  During the former president’s reign I marveled at how Christian evangelicals could put up with his unspeakable behavior, all apparently  motivated their thirst for power.  Has it not started to pay off?  Personally, I don’t care who your God is.  I’m happy for you to have one.

Forcing religion on anyone is not my cup of tea.  I’m even more resistant to Christianity since Marjorie Taylor Greene, Republican Representative from Georgia,  touted that the  Republican Party should conform to Christianity to make it easier to identify with and sway Christian voters.  I strongly resist any attempts to “sway” my judgment.  From <https://wordpress.com/read/blogs/24325815/posts/179764> (Besides, they would be hypocrites if they did).

WANTING TO BELIEVE — On the farm, at five, I remember both realizing and regretting that no one else could share my experience,  that each of us is separate.  I still regret it.

As a youth, at bedtime, I would sometimes hold one arm up in the air for minutes.   Any involuntary movement of my arm might be by God.  Nan  3/28/2022

Well, I’m certainly not going to pray to my fossil, but it sure is a  great symbol of power.  I’ll hang onto it for awhile, just in case…