What’s the word for having trouble with perspective? I’m loosey goosey in firm-footed perspective on many (most? All?) things. As a result I tend to be too acquiescent.
Looking back on my life I see that I am a reactor, not an actor. I have gone with the flow until the flow ends me somewhere else. Now, at 81 (I know, elsewhere on this blog I have miscounted my own age), a decision to ACT is too vulnerable to being discounted as the loosening of my marbles.
Intellect, Instinct or Genes? Or Randomness? Or something else?
There are so many crossroads in life! I have been swept along, usually (always?) without a struggle. I can see every side of an argument (usually) and can justly be called wishy-washy. Anger is so far underground that it may have mouldered away. I suspect this is a woman issue. How else to explain away the women who have voted for a man who denigrates, insults and dismisses them so unashamedly?.
Tears come to my eyes when I think deeply about penguins, whose lives are entirely pre-scripted. Their lives follow a narrow red carpet laid out before them. Why do I feel sorry for the penguins but not the migratory birds? Come to think about of it, maybe humans?
I’ve also agreed with the wise ones who encourage us to “go with the flow.” Ira Progoff says that we’re born with the seed in us of what we have the potential to become, if that isn’t limited or interfered with in some way to prevent our blossoming/becoming.
I apologize for (see, there I go again!) entangling so many issues here, but the fact is that they’re already entangled. Oh, and I forgot, a second problem I struggle with is poor judgment. That’s much more noticeable to others. Maybe it’s just my ripe old age that lets me look back and notice the zig-zaggy path my life has taken. To tell the truth, I’d not be willing to have another chance to live this particular life because I’m almost certain I wouldn’t end as well as I have, despite all the detours, potholes and roadblocks. I’m remarkably content at 81, despite, or maybe because of, the narrow misses….